How much that's objectionable should be avoided?

I've talked a couple of times recently with my mother about reading choices, both for oneself and on behalf of children.  It's tough to draw the line between avoiding inappropriate material and overdoing it.  When talking to my mom, I had arrived at an uncomfortable conclusion.  I felt uncomfortable with blanketly ruling against an entire book solely because of the use of a four-letter word or two, but because I couldn't figure out where to draw the line, I was erring, with her, on the side of over-censorship.

  This article by Robert Gray, published on Shelf Awareness's Book trade newsletter September 26, 2014 is about banned books.  I really connected with what Jeannette Walls had to say.

"My book has ugly elements to it, but it's about hope and resilience, and I don't know why that wouldn't be an important message," Walls said. "Sometimes you have to walk through the muck to get to the message.... What I worry is that in order to protect them, we may be taking away the tools they need to protect themselves later on."

Jeannette Walls' idea rang true. We should not remove all unpleasantness from reading, but we should use it as an opportunity to discuss our values.  For example, Grandma might choose to read Questionable Book at the same time as Granddaughter in order to have an opportunity to discuss the drug use, the sexual activity, and other objectionable behaviors.  If Grandma instead forbids Granddaughter to read it, that discussion will not happen.  We know Grandma wants to share her values with Granddaughter (that's one of the things parenting is all about!)--and the "objectionable" book may be a way to get the door open for that important communication.

In order to be well prepared for the choices life will present, a young person needs guidance.  Among other things, they need a basic but thorough knowledge of what things to avoid.  We don't want to wallow in the muck, but we certainly need to point it out, name it, and help the child know how to avoid getting mired in it.

This post is not as polished as I would like, but it's getting the gist, which is my own better-clarified thoughts about choosing "appropriate" books.  My thanks to Jeannette, and to Robert Gray, too.